Gardens of Melancholy

Red Fire Ball

I am the red fire ball as answer to the radical
I am the thirst unquenched for the enigma inspirited
I am the folly bound of the arduous mound
I am the primordial de-mystifier of the twisted genesis

Metamorphosis of Narcissus

Salvador Dali, one of the 20th Century Master Artists, is one of the founders of Surrealism. At that time, surrealism was a radically different approach to art, where the artist turned to his dreams and imagination, not the external world, as source material for artistic expression. Strongly influenced by the ideas of Sigmund Freud, Dali and others stunned the world with their strange and powerful symbolic images. Back in Paris after his great success in America Salvador Dali painted this picture. This is one of the most vivid works of Salvador Dali.

In Greek myth, Narcissus was a surpassingly beautiful young man who saw his reflection in a fountain and fell in love with it. According to one version, unable to fulfill his desires, he pined away; but in a more dramatic alternative he leaned forward to embrace the image, toppled into the water and drowned, Afterwards the gods transformed him into the water narcissus flower. Dali shows Narcissus sitting in a pool, gazing down, while not far away there is a decaying stone figure which corresponds closely to him but is perceived quite differently as a hand holding up a bulb or egg from which a narcissus is growing. In the background, a group of naked figures stand about attitudinizing, while a third narcissus like figure appears on the horizon.

Making World Gay for Gays

“My circle is artistic, philosophical and creative. My friends include the most popular artists, fashion designers, architects and writers of the city. Their brain is the vital attraction. And all of them are homosexuals”, proudly tells my pal who recently opened up to the society, realizing his true sexual preferences to be that of gay.

Queers, as they are called in a less dignified way, have not been accepted openly in the society. Implication of this is the formation of small alienated sects in the society. There are separate nights for homosexuals. Society itself creates rifts and when the rift is wide enough they crib about its existence. Why there is such a stigma attached to fags?

What makes us detest homosexuals and why we are unable to accept them as normal beings that have a different sexual orientation? Is that such a big deal? I guess it is! It is easy to say I will be perfectly normal, but difficult to implement. No matter how much conscious effort you make there will be stages when you tend to lower down the shutters and scream, “It is too much, you guys are so gay”. The mental blocks we have are too heavy to move I guess, but it is not totally a hopeless situation.

Last night I met two gay couples. I talked to one of them on phone before the meeting, he sounded perfectly normal like any straight guy. Before meeting them I had a strange kind of fear in myself, but I convinced myself that the best way get rid of this fear is to face whatever, it is. I met them in jovial spirits, and they also greeted me well. We went to the Nescafe picked up coffees of our strength and sat down to talk. A brief introduction, was followed by talks on what turns a gay on? This 50 year old guy, 6 ft and chubby, almost the age of my father, said that he has fetish for straight men. That was a blatant conjecture aimed at me that I was turning him on. A sense of discomfort engulfed my veins. After that he started hitting on me. I was like no ways can I let you cross your limits. And I could feel, what is it to be raped by eyes, something called ‘dormant rapes’.

I asked him one question, what do you think makes people detest gays? It is this attitude of theirs, that they start hitting on every second guy they see. I respect your sexual priority that doesn’t mean you start seducing every guy get attracted to. I met you people since I respect you guys, I respect the talent you have, the brains that you possess, do not demean them by some filthy action driven by sexual motives. Being gay is perfectly ok, but you have to keep your sexual life aloof from that of straight people. It is not that every second ass you see, you got to penetrate it.

One reason for this could be that gays are highly frustrated. This particular guy had all the success in his life, almost an empire built by him just by his creativity but he doesn’t have sexual satisfaction in his life. He is married to a woman, he has two kids almost my age, but his sexual life is not smug. He couldn’t open up before marriage; I don’t know how difficult it would have been for his wife, just because of the society we have. Proclaimed gays are few in number, since people fear from coming out, they fear rejection on part of society, parents and family.

It has to be joint effort, we have to be broad minded and we have to remove the mental blocks. And gays have also got to respect straight guy’s sexuality. Obviously if you go about touching a straight guy on his body he will surely feel molested, which is detestable by anyone.

Make a conscious effort to stay aware of what and why you are thinking, whenever you encounter gay issues, remove the mental blocks.