Monday, February 21, 2005

Day 1, 2005

The year two thousand and five began with half a dozen quick shots of bizarre Russian vodka, followed by twenty minutes of neck wrecking head banging to deafening noisy music, burning neighbour’s door plate, accompanied by guttural abusing that made no sense. Eventually I land up in toilet unconscious in the puddle of puke. I woke up probably shivering due to cold. I shakily moved to my room where the floor was full of chips & broken glass pecks. Somehow I found the switch and turned the lights of off. I crashed into the bed with music still on. I had just caught a couple of hour’s hard found sleep that I am woken by a friend. We planned to go to AIIMS for paranthas. Half an hour of struggle finally resulted in inedible paranthas. Satisfying our hunger with our effort we returned and had coffee at our favorite hangout, Nescafe. I cleaned my room, washed it in fact, which is a rare effort and crashed into bed again.

Things change with time and something’s change in a way that is very much desired. While I was fast asleep the woman of my dreams for whom I yearned so much that in the end I had to convince myself that she is out of my reach, rings up. Her name is beautiful, first thought. Why is she calling? Following thought. Your mind unconsciously generates stupid questions and at times answers that are not stupid. May be to wish, ‘happy new year’. “Hii”, her voice is sweet. “Hi! Happy new year”. Hey thanks and same to you…So wassup. Some unwanted stuff always follows as fillers. “I am coming to IIT”. “To IIT... okay kewl. Come! How much time will you take?” “About half an hour” I quickly refreshed my self and got ready. Do I need to do a little better to my dress? I convinced myself it’s not a woman coming to marry you. Be Normal! Be what you are! I hate to wait and she didn’t make me do so. I went down to the hostel entrance on receiving her call.

Two gorgeous young ladies waiting in a car, smiling with a stint of mischief in it. As if they are ridiculing. “Hi”, my usual monotonous woman hi. There is different ‘Hi’ I have for men, which is generally accompanied by a sarcastic remark or a jolting hug. But with woman it is different. You pretend to be a man not a kid. But I certainly wasn’t able to cast any such impression. Instead I was looking like a clumsy kid, who was running of short of words. Men are different in front of woman. So am I. I tried my best to be a gentleman, which I am not. First sight of hers, she looked prettier than before. I was finding it hard to make direct eye contact with her; instead I was again and again looking towards cousin. It is said you can’t look into eyes when you are hiding something. Yes I was hiding something. I was hiding my love for her. Given a chance I would have made the whole world listen to it. But no, that wasn’t the scene. My love was going to get married to someone else.

I took them to Nescafe. And man like every one else they appreciated it. High heels, slow walk and time after time her hair…isn’t that annoying? Perhaps not when you are in love.
We took the corner table. Conversation went on for around an hour and a half. We talked about New Years Eve, about our drinking capacities blah blah… occasionally I looked her into eyes and at times I found her do the same. She could easily see love in my eyes. But I wasn’t sure of her eyes. I am dumb at expression reading, unless it is a cow made of your face.

My friend called up. He wanted me to accompany him to brunch. I recalled I promised him in the morning. I had to leave. I am a man of my words. Whatever happens, I lay my words above ethics, morality…I guess god also. And my love was not sure enough to break my words. I left the women, a little unsatisfied as if they wanted me to stay but I could not.

1 comment:

Penguin said...

ruk jaata be :-)